My mother's advice

This is an excerpt from my mother's radio program, Gateway to Joy, when she talked about transformed marriages.  It is true, within 36 hrs. Of our wedding, even though we couldn't imagine before the wedding that she was right, we had sinned, and hurt each other.  She gave us wisdom and graciously prepared us, since we had really not experienced each other's sin beforehand! Walt and I are very thankful for her advice....take your hurt to the foot of the Cross, where there is forgiveness, and when one repents, one can get up with His strength and grace and go on, committing again to love and be gracious.

"Not very long before my daughter and her husband got married, they actually sat down in the kitchen and asked me to give them advice. I don't know very many young couples that do that. I was so gratified, I could hardly believe my ears.

A young couple asking me for advice, especially my own daughter and my future son-in-law? "Yes," they said. "Just start talking. Give us advice."

And you know what I said to them? I said, "You're going to hurt each other." And they looked at each other with utter disbelief. Hurt each other?? How could they possibly do that when they love each other with such a passion? I said, "Well, guess what? I'm right. You will hurt each other. Probably not until after the wedding, but you know, it could be within 24 hours or so. I know because God has given me, in His amazing providence, three different husbands. Very different. I've hurt everyone of them. I know I did. And I've had to respond differently to each of them." But what else is new?

Anyway, I said to them. "You will hurt each other. Remember you heard it here first, and when it happens then remember that there is forgiveness. Jesus Christ forgives us when we repent and take the hurt first of all to the foot of the cross, not to the other person. Don't just snap back and get even. That's not going to get you anywhere. Take it to the foot of the cross. Lay it out before the Lord. Repent of your own anger and fear and hurt." But why should I repent of the hurt, somebody might say. Well, not specifically because of the hurt itself perhaps, but what were your reactions exactly? What were your thoughts about the one who had hurt you?"

I now have been married 37 years, and it still amazes me that I can hurt my husband and am insensitive to my his needs, as well as how I could love and encourage him.....God is in the business of sanctifying us, and that is my hope and comfort!  I still have that selfish old "man" that rises up inside of me and wants his way, but I'm so thankful also for Gal. 2:20.  May that encourage you today also.